The sun may be shining today, but do you care? I mean, really, could you give a darn? Sometimes, there are days when unresolved grief stalks us and nothing is right, friends, weather, even small gifts offered with love, just amount to a blah, so what ! And you don't even feel guilty, maybe you feel indifferent, numb. How well I remember the feeling.
I remember NOT calling friends for fear I would become a burden. After all, that divorce was over and done with by now, and my mother died in her mid-80's, a good age to go, I was long-divorced from the father of my two children so what if he died unexpectedly, why would I still feel anything for him? And so on. Are you nodding because you know what I'm talking about? Good.
Why good? Because you have admitted there is something off with this grieving business, and you may be good and ready to get past it, finally.
So welcome with an open heart from me to you, for there is hope of recovery from your broken heart and it will not take thousands of dollars or hours on a therapy couch. Now, you may well need the benefit of therapy, I certainly did, and got it. But with unresolved grief clouding the sunshine in your life, you may be spinning your wheels in traditional counseling or even well-meaning grief groups, which can be a great comfort and definitely have their place, I'm not saying stop going or don't even try to go. I AM saying that the process of grief recovery is different because it puts your loss into the general context of your life as a whole, and gives you specific assignments which move you through the pain.
Do NOT go into the neighborhood of grief by yourself. It's unsafe and you could get hurt. Grief Recovery provides a map and in a few weeks, you may well care that the sun is shining, you may actually feel like handing out a few bouquets, actually notice how the roses smell and really CARE, once again.
I am here to support you on this journey. Please join me.